Friday, 27 November 2015

Oh right... Should probably finish the story...

After we got our wishes we kind of forgot about this and I'm sure most of the people who would have cared to know how our story ended have probably forgotten by now as well. Still it's a terrible thing to leave a story unfinished.

This is Genome by the way. I'm typing this... With hands. Actual flesh and blood hands. My name is actually Gloria in fact. It's strange... All that time I spent as a Thoughtborn I had forgotten my real life. To the point that the life I replaced my memories with turned out to be so far from the truth...

Our final trial ended up being to fight against some... guy... Back when I was a computer I could probably have told you who it was, but a lot of my memories are going as my human memories return. We were helped by apparently the only other person to win their challenges, but either way we still got our asses kicked even with me helping Drake out. Turns out though the entire thing was a sham of some sort. Some story about trying to reclaim the powers of The Fears... I don't care, the point is we won the challenges and we were rewarded. I was made human again. I'm 21, female. In fact I look just like Fake Genome did. Apparently the form she kept taking was mine. Which in retrospect makes that last challenge more upsetting. Drake agrees and after the revelation we were both a bit uncomfortable thinking about it.

Speaking of as part of winning we were both sent back to our world. Drake being technically dead and me being a couple decades out of time, the world has no real place for us. Which suits us just fine. We got an apartment together. A few memories I retained from my time as a living computer included a couple of quick ways to make money... Not exactly legally, but whatever. Drake isn't as much of a loser as he seemed when I was a nigh omniscient god and actually quite handsome and in his words "I'm not quite as much of a bitch" so we're pretty happy together.

I guess that's it.

Happily ever after and stuff...

Friday, 19 April 2013

Final Challenge.

Ok why the hell was I frozen this time?

No real reason. 

Well thanks... I love being trapped in nonexistence for long periods of time.

Stop complaining. What's the next challenge?

Your final challenge. 

What already?


Sweet. One more and we're done.

One more failure and we are done as well. Remember that.

Right... So no failing this challenge.

So what is the challenge?

The other Genome has suddenly taken a human form. That of a young human female.

Your challenge is to design a challenge. I will be taking your place in the challenge.

Wait I get to create a challenge for you?


Oh this is going to be awesome.

I imagine you will greatly enjoy causing me suffering.

Um... Well... Yeah...

Then I am glad I cannot truly feel pain.

Ah well then I guess I don't have to feel guilty about it.

Drake... I have a bad feeling about this.

What could go wrong Drake. This is going to be the most fun challenge yet. First I think... A door...

A door has appeared in front of Femnome. She cautiously reaches out and grasps the door knob to open it.

... with an electrified handle...

Femnome cries out as her hand is shocked by the door and she lets go tumbling backwards. She stands back up and tears off her dress using it to grab the doorknob and open it.

... That opens to a white hallway...

She heads into the hallway

... Full of boobytraps...

She steps onto a pressure pad and an arrow launches out of the wall and into her shoulder forcing her to stumble onto another pressure pad which launches another arrow into her side. She falls to her hands and knees. Her hand landing on another pressure pad but this one launches at head level and therefore misses her crawling form. She crawls the rest of the way only being hit by one other arrow which hit her in the wrist rendering her left hand unusable and forcing her to drag herself the rest of the way

... That leads to a pitch black room...

She feels her way into the room dragging herself still

... full of spike pits...

Her hand reaches out and brushes over empty air and quickly changes direction carefully guiding herself through the room.

... The Room suddenly transforms into a bright white room with an open roof...

She blinks at the sudden light and looks up

... revealing the massive meteorite heading down towards the room preparing to incinerate everything in it...

Her eyes widen and she turns as quickly as possible to head out of the room.

...The room is inescapable as the door has since disappeared.



What are you doing?

Getting revenge.

You're going to kill her.

She's killed me at least 3 times besides she's not even really alive.

Neither am I! Besides that's not the point! She took your place and you took hers but it's still your challenge.

Your point?

If she fails this challenge you failed the challenge. You're about to kill yourself.

Oh... Um the meteorite suddenly disappears!

Nothing happened! I don't think you can take back any part of the challenge!

What do I do?!

Think of something!

It's going to kill her!


Wait I've got something I just have to let her win before it hits!

You have less than a minute!

A flower appears in front of her with a sign saying pluck me.

She's to worried to trust you!

... Another sign appears saying "I forgive you now pluck the damn flower before we all die"

She hesitates but plucks the flower with her usable hand.

Challenge completed.

The meteorite has frozen in mid air and everything is beginning to disappear.

We are now floating in empty space. Femnome is here looking unharmed.

Congratulations. You've completed your solo challenges.

Yes! AWESOME NOW I- Wait... Solo challenges?

Yes. You will be sent to a waiting room. There will be luxuries there for both of you to wait until the other challengers have completed their challenges. Please enjoy your rest.

Wednesday, 16 January 2013

Final transition Challenge

Wake up Drake. You are being released to your final challenge.

Oh isn't that just great. I've been so looking forward to that.  

You are getting much better at your sarcasm.

Thanks. Your approval is all I ever needed in life.

Nevermind it's just as horrible as always.

Oh shut up.

I will not be able to accompany you on this next challenge.

What? Why?

It is for you alone.

Well if it means not having to put up with your comments that's fine with me.

This door will send you to your next challenge.



Ok... Frozen wasteland. Very cold... That's... That's not normal actually. Genome pointed out it's always been the same temperature here even in the desert. O.K. so challenge has to do with the cold... Do I have to survive?

2 minutes

If so there's probably some sort of time limit in play.

4 minutes

How long does a human normally take to freeze to death? The time limit will probably be longer than whatever that is. First step build a fire?

12 minutes

Building a fire is difficult.

24 minutes

Ok still haven't gotten a fire lit and my toes and fingers are getting numb. I need to think of something fast.

33 minutes

Ok... Still no fire... My fingers are still numb and turning blue and I feel tired. I think I might be hallucinating too... I keep hearing snatches of singing on the wind.

48 minutes

The wind is picking up and whipping snow at my face. It stings. My fingers are turning black and I can't move them. I'm scared to try and make a fire now. I'm worried if I try and touch anything my fingers will snap off. Hallucinations getting worse. Keep seeing young frozen boy. Think it might be me. Like me when I freeze... I don't want to freeze... So cold...

56 minutes

The boy isn't me. I'm freezing. Slumped here in the snow. He's watching me. I remember hearing about him. Genome mentioned him once... He was telling me about all the horrible things out there. Loneliness... Genome... So cold... Genome... I'm sorry. I miss you. You're an ass but thinking about it I understand. You seem unsympathetic and you aren't. You can't be. I keep thinking you're basically just a human brain in a machine but you're not. You said it yourself you only remember bits and pieces of your human life. It makes sense then that you'd have trouble understanding my pain... I wish you were here. I don't want to die alone.

1 hour 1 minute

That's all I needed to hear.

1 hour 5 minutes

I feel warmer now... I don't see the boy.

Hello Drake.

Genome! I'm sorry. 

I'm sorry too. It's hard to keep in mind how vulnerable and pathetic you humans are. I'll try to be more sympathetic to your weaknesses. Assuming you will allow me to continue accompanying you.

I'm going to assume that you were actually being entirely sincere and the insults were unintentional and say sure. We'll reach the end together alright?

Thank you. Hey... Do you mind if I don't stop being a dick though? Teasing you is fun.

... Yeah sure whatever.

Challenge... Completed. Though not in the way intended. Regardless you have completed your transition challenges. You will be returned to your normal challenges shortly.

Alright. Time to get you human again buddy.

Yes... Although I must ask... What will you want when we win?

I don't know... I mostly just don't want to be here anymore. I want everything back to normal.

... You do realize even before the challenges and the tournament you were being stalked by Slenderman, right?

Yeah... I suppose that's what I'd want for him to leave me alone.

I hope they can grant you that.

A girlfriend would be nice too...

Don't get greedy.

I was kidding...    

Monday, 14 January 2013

Release and Transition Challenge # 5

It's really boring in there. Even more so without someone to talk too...

Yes yes we all know you miss Genome. Either admit it or shut up about how lonely you are.

Besides you will have plenty of time to complain about isolation in the final transition challenge.

This is the final transition challenge?

No of course not. You still have two more.


Now then for this challenge we thought we would borrow a book from the other popular challenges.

What do you mean?

Well Saylo Xdranyl and Gordon have both been having challenges entirely related to card games. Yu-Gi-Oh in particular.

So what you're going to make me fight someone in a card game?


I don't have any cards...

Don't worry a deck has been provided for you.

Wha? Oh yes I see. How did I not notice the deck of cards right in front of me... It's almost like it just appeared there.

Your sarcasm makes little sense in this context without the readers actually seeing what happened.

Don't care.

Wait these aren't Yu-Gi-Oh cards... They're Magic: the Gathering cards?

Of course. Only losers play Yu-Gi-Oh... It's a children's card game.

Right... So who's my opponent?


... Um how so?

Well I will temporarily be given a human form in order to combat you.

Oh um ok...

I will however still be in your mask as well to narrate the fight.

Wait won't that mean you can see my cards though?

Don't be such a whiner I won't cheat.



It would appear I have been given the form of a young woman of roughly the same age as Drake. Strange I had expected to be in the form of... This is unimportant. As you are the one being challenged I shall allow you to go first.

Cool thanks... So um... How do I play?


I've never actually played this game before... A friend of mine used to like it but I never really understood it. 

... Well ok draw seven cards.

Alright I've drawn Amalgam Herald, Two decayed grounds, Ariadne, Reirr, Chillis and

Idiot don't tell me your cards!


Now then each turn you should put down a land if you have one.

What's a land?

... For your deck the Decayed Grounds are your land. Your deck is special and uses what is called Universe Mana instead of the normal Mana associated with the game.

Right okay... What's Mana?

... Fuck it.

The cards have vanished replaced with a deck of playing cards.

We're going to play Go fish instead. You know how to play that at least right?

Of course.

Good. We have each been dealt 7 cards.

Do you have any tens?

... 3 tens... This deck was not properly shuffled.

Didn't you shuffle it?

This challenge is over you've succeeded go away.

Oh cool.

Sunday, 6 January 2013

Transition Challenge #4

So what the hell is this challenge?

What does it look like?

... A strange circus performance.


There's a giant dartboard and a pit full of hedgehogs...

They are porcupines actually...

Whatever the hell they are what am I supposed to do with them?

Well there is a dartboard and no darts but a bunch of prickly little creatures right nearby. What do you think you might have to do here?

Do I have to throw the porcupines at a dart board?


That seems a little... Um horrifically cruel

It would be if these were real porcupines but of course they are merely more of the tale weavers creations like myself.

Oh well ok then... Um except they're all covered in quills how am I supposed to grab them.

Not my problem.

... You're actually starting to make me miss Genome. That's not cool.

Starting? You were blubbering like a baby about how you were all alone now just a few minutes ago.

Well they didn't know that...

They do now.

You bastard.

Well I don't miss Genome. I just don't want to be alone. Genome can go to hell.

Ok enough. Commence with the challenge.

Fine... Ok let's see here...

Drake is attempting to coax one of the porcupines onto his hand. It is not working.

He appears to be getting frustrated.

He has made a grab for one of the porcupines.


He has impaled his hand on it's quills. However it is now in fact stuck to his hand...

Good job Drake you caught one.

Go me...

Now throw it. You must get a total of 300 points.

Ow ow... Right 300 points... With only 6-STOP SQUIRMING DAMN IT!- Porcupines... Lowest score possible is 20 points highest 100 but the 100 space is OW FUCKING HELL STAY STILL! a tiny block in the exact shape of one of the porcupines and I doubt I'll be able to get that. Next lowest is 75 and then 50 If I get OW FUCK ok that's it throwing this bastard now figuring it out later!

Drake has thrown the poor critter. He has completely missed the dartboard...

... It's not easy tossing a living thing. Especially a struggling little thing that's impaled in your hand.

Drake missed the dartboard entirely by 8 and a half feet.

It's really not easy...

Do better.

Wow my hand is bleeding a lot... Porcupine quills aren't poisonous are they?

I don't know or care grab another one.

... I don't have much of a choice huh.

Drake has picked up another porcupine and again managed to get impaled. However he was smart enough this time to grab it by the underside with his other hand and remove it before throwing. He got a 20. You still need to do better. 

I am really starting to hate you.

Wah wah... Just throw the damn animals.

Drake has proceeded to toss the next 3 porcupines in rapid succession with only minimal maiming. He has scored a 50 a 75 and another 75. See I told you to do better and you did.

What are you talking about I have one porcupine left and I need at least 80 points.

Well yes you're essentially doomed but you're still doing better than you were earlier.

Well I'm not entirely doomed... I mean I could hit the bullseye...

No you're doomed.

Wow thanks for the faith... I'm gonna hit that bullseye.

Whatever you say. Although I should warn you that if you do not land the porcupine perfectly on the bullseye it counts instead as a 75.

I figured as much. well time to make the most perfect shot in the history of forever. Porcupine shaped porcupine in the porcupine shaped hole. Just like the second challenge.

Drake has picked up the final porcupine. He's transferred it to his throwing hand. He's aiming. He's thrown it! It's going! It's going! Woah... He actually fucking made it.


Unfortunately you still failed the challenge.

What bullshit I have 320 points. That's 20 more than 300!

Exactly. The goal was to get 300.

... Wait I had to get exactly 300?

Yes. I did say earlier that you were doomed.

That's fucking bullshit!

This is what happens when you don't pay attention to the instructions.

No. God damn it. This is stupid.

Stupid or not you failed this transition challenge. You will be sent back to the holding cell


Thursday, 3 January 2013

Wish Granted.


Are you awake?


You've been healed. We should continue the challenges now.

Genome... You were human once. Do you remember anything about it?

Some things.

Do you remember pain?

Only vaguely why?

... Go away.


Leave. I don't want you here. I never did. I hated you in The Game Master's challenges. I still hate you now.


What? Did you think we were bonding or something? Tied together by a mutual desire to get to the end? I put up with you here without complaint because you were helpful. It's over. Having to put up with you isn't worth it anymore.

But I need to be with you... I need to be human again. I want to be human again... I want to feel-

I don't care. I don't have any sympathy for you. Any suffering you endure is undoubtedly well deserved.


What? Nothing to say?

You know what... Fine. You can do these challenges by yourself. I don't know why I wanted to be human anyways. I am an invincible, technological god you're a worthless, vulnerable chunk of meat. Good luck surviving on your own.

Genome has left. I shall work through the mask instead to post your activities.

Wait he's gone?


He... He actually left?



Is something wrong?

No... Of course not. I'm glad he's gone.

Good then may I suggest you continue on to the next transition challenge.

Soon... Just give me... Just give me some time... To celebrate his departure... Yeah... To celebrate... Being alone again...

Tuesday, 1 January 2013

transition Challenge #3

In honor of the new year we designed this next challenge to be festive. 

That sounds fun.

Yes welcome to the festival of sharp pointy things.

That sounds less fun.

It appears to just be another hallway... This one enclosed on top however... Strange...

So where are the sharp pointy things exactly?

Why don't you step down the hallway and find out?

Why don't I throw this mask down the hallway and see if that does anything.

I can't be removed from your face first of all and second of all the challenge is probably designed in such a way that only you will be able to set it off.

... Damn you logic.

You can't just stay here forever. Got to go sometime.

Alright fine...

Drake has taken a step down the hall. Immediately a panel opened in the wall and shot out a spear which went through the palm of Drake's left hand and nailed it against the opposite wall.

Drake is crying like a child.

Shut the fuck up! That fucking hurt.

Well getting free is going to hurt more...

W... what?

The Spear is pretty deeply embedded in the wall and the back end extends into the other wall. There's no way to release your hand but to tear it through.

NO! No fucking way I'm not doing that!

Then we're going to be stuck here for a long time as it doesn't seem to be showing any inclination to retract.

There has to be another way. Maybe if I hit a certain area on the floor I can

Drake has just managed to trigger another spear which has impaled him through the right knee. 

Good job Drake now you need to tear a spear through your palm and your knee. Although it's entirely likely that one in the knee could sever the entire leg.


No response?

Drake appears to be too busy sobbing with pain to respond.

He is tapping his other foot on the floor now. I believe he is attempting to kill himself. Unfortunately there do not seem to be another spear. The spears continue showing no inclination to retract on their own and they are ding a very good job of plugging up the holes to keep him from bleeding to death. It would appear you don't have a choice. You're going to have to mutilate yourself further to get free.

No... I can't...

You're going to have too... 

I... I don't want... I don't want to do this...

Man up and do it!

He's pulling back his hand and I can hear him cursing as the flesh begins to tear. His fingers are contorting outwards as the skin splits. Just a few more inches Drake don't wimp out. He's through! Oh that is gross. His hand is just split down the middle his ring and pinky finger are hanging away from the rest of the hand. Hey... Hey Drake can you still move those fingers? Oh ew you can.

Genome... Please just this once... Don't be an asshole...

Right sorry. Now for the leg... He's stepping forward and the spear is tearing out through the back of his knee. He's through and he's pitching forward. Can't get up.

Leg... Torn... Can't move...


I can't move...


Good boy. More spears are jutting out but he seems to be safe on the floor. Probably should have just crawled the entire way...

It hurts so much...

Keep going you're almost at the exit. 

There see you made it no big deal.


Drake are you ok?

Subject Drake appears to have passed out. He will be given a short rest and medical treatment.